Chastened Inspiration

I'm not one for prevailing methods of primping--

daily hair-styling, make up, and hot oil treatments

have always seemed, to me, a waste of time and effort.

I have my own sense of winsomeness, my own

habits and ways of enhancing my outward strengths

that don't include padding the pockets of Paul Mitchell,

Ulta, Mac, and Chi.

But now and again, I get inspired to experiment

with tools and treatments unfamiliar to me,

by nobody's fault but my own:

You'd think coconut oil is coconut oil,

but you'd be wrong. I learned the hard way

as I meticulously massaged coconut oil

scented vaseline into my scalp, enthusiastically ensured

the petroleum jelly reached every hair follicle from the source

outward, down the shaft length of every hair,

to the very split ends I was resolved to address.

Ten washes later (six with dish soap),

I'm finally feeling a little less like a duck in an oil slick.

My hair is more than a little worse for wear,

my inspiration for beauty treatments chastened.